Day 67. I cannot continue like this, I don't think I can sustain this without it being self destructive. Part of me wants that because it brings about the feeling that I'm in a kind of altered state of reality. When all you see in the real world is people moving around simply because that's what you do, with no thought as to what they really might like to do, it's quite oppresive. Somedays it's necessary to play out the mundane routine tasks that have to be done, but one migh hope there is some sort of repreive at the end to let you indulge and sink into another world. A world where you don't need to think about how those mundane tasks are slowly driving you insane. It's quite ironic that when you can't handle these everyday tasks or absolutley detest them, that's when people consider that you have possibly already entered the zone of madness. It's just a shame that being in an altered state of mind is so good, but certainly not sustainable.