9.18am and already I don't know if I'll get through the day. Watching everyone at the school run this morning. How mundane it seems to be. But every other mum or dad appears to be happy. Why? do they think that it doesn't get any better so therefore they better be happy about it. At least this morning when I woke I didn't immediately think that going back to sleep would be the best way to get through the day, not having to face anything. But now that I'm back home it seems like an easy option. I could just take a pill and sleep for the rest of the day. But then I'd be rid of any interesting thoughts that might come my way. I'm going to go to the studio. I plan to at least get a couple of ideas written down and start at least one painting. I can listen to music that will take my mind elsewhere, pretend I'm someone else, somewhere else in my head.