How an earth did I get this far into this and not really have travelled beyond my capabilities. Sometimes I just keep telling myself it's not worth it and it will only bring about disappointment. Day 63 and I've gone way to far to think yet seem to have covered little ground. Today the same feelings all appeared again. It's often at certain times of the day and I really should distract myself but the thoughts come in waves and I want so much to ignore them, yet I let them flood my body, like a sensation of relief. It's a solution to a problem, except I'm never quite sure what the problem is. How does one conclude an answer and even begin to try and solve a puzzle when the question presented is ambiguous or not even understood in any why what so ever. Some days I just push all the thoughts away and perhaps there are times when I'm totally unaware that they are even there, entering my head. Other days I let them invade my head and body and give in to them. I give in, just when I think I've forgotten about them or thought that I had them figured out, but alas they invade with a passion and send convulsion like shivers through me. I don't know the question and that means I've a long way to go before I can answer it.