Right now I feel like I could stay awake forever. There's been so much to do and seemingly so little time to get it all done. If I go to bed now I'll be up in 3 hours doing it all over again. It's quiet in the night when you're the only one awake. The hum of whitegoods in the background and occasionally the sound of what I think is a possum outside. If I listen carefully I can hear the rush of cars going by up on the main road. I miss living in the hub of activity. This place is way too quiet for me. Strange that when I'm awake in the wee hours and struggle to hear the sounds of the outside world I feel kind of different and it reinforces what I think of myself. Yet during the if there are no sounds indicating life outside I almost panic. I feel a strange sense of loss and loneliness. I need to hear the sounds of daily life going on. It reassures me that I'm real and that people can perhaps see me, not through me.