I've not idea where, why or how the feeling invades my mind and body. But one minute I'm living what I think is a standard kind of life and the next minute I'm jolted into hell as that sense of impending doom floods my body and seeps into my mind. I try a deep breath and if spreads a sense of calm through my veins, but it only lasts 1 or 2 seconds and then a sense of utter despair spreads through my veins. It won't leave me alone and I detest it being there. It leaves me incapable of carrying out the mundane tasks of everyday life, yet instils a sense of frenzied need to wallow, or possibly indulge, in random crazed thoughts that come into my mind. It doesn't matter if the thoughts are right, wrong or indifferent, at the point when they come rushing from my mind and surge through my body, I cannot claim I feel any sense of judgement, just intense dersire.